By Violet Li
A Cranbourne East man who took his own life in early 2021 suffered from deteriorated mental health due to the breakdown of his relationship and the subsequent online bullying and abuse, a State Coroner has found.
Brendon (not his real name) lived in Cranbourne East as a carer for his grandmother at the time of his death.
The then-35-year-old formed a romantic relationship a few years before his passing, which ended when he discovered an affair with a long-term male acquaintance of his.
He was initially physically assaulted when he confronted the pair and then he was sent “harassing electronic messages” including telling him to end his life.
Brendon admitted to his mother he was struggling with his mental health as a result.
About three weeks before his death, Brendon sent his mother a screenshot of an abusive message. The message, according to the recall of the mother, implied that Brendon attempted suicide before and induced him to “get it right next time”.
Brendon’s mother told the coroner that she was not aware whether her son had made a previous suicide attempt, but she tried to engage him in mental health support or medication.
Brendon declined as he knew the problem and believed “things would be better once his former partner was out of his life”.
A day before his passing, Brendon sent his family a message saying: “I’ve had enough and can’t deal with everything anymore.”
State Coroner Simon McGregor believed that although copies of the abusive messages sent to Brendon by his former partner and male acquaintance had not survived, “an indictable offence might have been committed by the act of sending them”.
He then confirmed that no charges were ultimately laid.
Brendon grew up in Belgrave South and was described as a “happy child” by his mother.
He left school at age 16. While struggling academically, he was always good with his hands and interested in motor mechanics.
He became his grandmother’s carer when she developed dementia and “remained devoted to giving her the best care he could” until his passing.
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